Alzheimer's, the Disease from Hell
My family and I are in Kansas helping my mother in law and father in law. My mother in law has Alzheimer's.
My wife, her sister, and her dad are making some extraordinarily difficult decisions about what the next step in her care should be. My mother in law has deteriorated rapidly in the past year. A woman who was a great cook, loved her family, and good natured has been turned into a shell of her former self.
My father in law tried valiantly for the past year or two to care for his wife. But he's in his 80s. His love and devotion is inspiring. But sometimes even that is not enough when your loved one has Alzheimer's, the disease from hell.
While my mother in law has some physical problems, she's in generally good health. The odd thing about Alzheimer's is that it is a disease that seems to have as much or more negative impact on friends and family of the sufferer than the sufferer. Now, my mother in law doesn't realize how much cognitive ability she's lost. In the early stages, she did realize it. Now, she's in her own world.
I wouldn't wish this disease on my worst enemy. It is cruel. You can only hope to slow it down but not cure it--at least yet.
If there is any silver lining to this horrific cloud it is that my wife's family and my family all realize how much we love my mother in law and how much we want her to be safe and comfortable.
For now, that's the best we can hope.
My wife, her sister, and her dad are making some extraordinarily difficult decisions about what the next step in her care should be. My mother in law has deteriorated rapidly in the past year. A woman who was a great cook, loved her family, and good natured has been turned into a shell of her former self.
My father in law tried valiantly for the past year or two to care for his wife. But he's in his 80s. His love and devotion is inspiring. But sometimes even that is not enough when your loved one has Alzheimer's, the disease from hell.
While my mother in law has some physical problems, she's in generally good health. The odd thing about Alzheimer's is that it is a disease that seems to have as much or more negative impact on friends and family of the sufferer than the sufferer. Now, my mother in law doesn't realize how much cognitive ability she's lost. In the early stages, she did realize it. Now, she's in her own world.
I wouldn't wish this disease on my worst enemy. It is cruel. You can only hope to slow it down but not cure it--at least yet.
If there is any silver lining to this horrific cloud it is that my wife's family and my family all realize how much we love my mother in law and how much we want her to be safe and comfortable.
For now, that's the best we can hope.
Update on Thursday, July 10, 2008 by
Todd Epp
Todd Epp
Thank you everyone for your kind and beautiful thoughts and prayers. My wife Donna, her sister Sharon, my daughter Sarah, and my father in law Don are the main ones bearing the burden of how to deal with Vera. Vera had a bad day yesterday and got very angry around evening. I hope that medical science can someday find a cure for his horrible disease. It literally steals a person’s mind.
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Reader Comments (8)
Todd,
Thoughts and prayers for you, your wife, and her family. I watched my wife and her family go through this with her grandmother 15 years ago, and I truly wouldn’t wish the hell of that on anyone. If your wife hasn’t contacted one of the local Alzheimer support groups, I encourage her (and you) to. Simply talking to others who understand what is going on can help.
Anthony D. Renli
Hey, Todd...
Even though we don't always agree politically (Liberal vs. Libertarian), I just want to say that you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
Though no family members have had Alzheimers, thankfully, I've seen loved ones in their decline. It's rough for everyone and you have my support.
Todd,
We buried my mother last December. Her memory had deteriorated steadily for three years or so. I believe that after she was gone was the first time in a year that she'd known my name.
Fortunately, the last time she saw her great-grandkids she was relatively lucid.
My brothers and I moved our perents to assisted living when it became clear that they were unable to physically care for each other. It was a difficult decision for us. I'm sure your decisions are as difficult for your family.
Best wishes.
My great-grandmother had it, and I agree with you: it's hard to imagine a more terrible disease.
My prayers are with you and your family.
Your Wife's family is in my prayers
Todd, you and your family are all are in my thoughts and prayers. I'm sure sorry that you all are going through this.
What's important about this disease is that when they can no longer remember you, you are still remembering them. There is alot of honor in giving your time to someone that no longer knows or acknowledges you, or themselves.
My thoughts are with your family.
Jeni
Todd, I lost my father to Alzheimer's 12 years ago. He was in a nursing home for 7 years before he passed away. He was mostly in a bed the last 2 years of his life. I know there are lessons for us all when we are going through these tough times. I'm just not sure what they are. At the same time my mom had breast cancer. She passed away 4 years later. Sometimes life just isn't fair. It is in those times that having a strong faith sustains us. Your family is in my prayers. Deb